...Egyptian. Both of my parents immigrated from Egypt; my father moved in 1970 for grad school, and my mother moved when she married him in 1980. I was born in the U.S. 3 years later. My brother, my parents, one uncle and myself make up the entire American branch of the family; all of my other relatives live in Egypt. When I was little, we would go back for month-long visits almost every year. When I was five, my mom took my brother and I back to Alexandria for a school year; that was the longest stretch of time I've ever spent there. The yearly visits stopped when I was 11; I went back with my dad and brother once more when I was 15, and haven't been back since.
I really, really, REALLY want to go back now that I'm an adult. It bugs me that I haven't seen my family in so long, epecially my grandmother. I have no idea when it's going to be feasible for me to do so.
I spoke Arabic as a child, but cannot read nor write anything but my first name. I can't really speak or understand much anymore; I can keep up w/ little kid stuff like "take out the trash", "turn off the light", "i love you, good night", or "careful! that's hot", so I can get by at home when my mom slips into Arabic, but I can't have any kid of a real conversation w/ most of my relatives without a translator.
I grew up in the South, so my self-identity is this wierd jumble of American, Southern, Egyptian, and just plain other. Homesickness could mean a craving for fried catfish or kushari. I would kill for some Umm Kulthum cd's; despite the fact that I can;t understand most of the words, the music can make me cry, and think of my family.
Yet most of my relatives would insist I was completely American, w/ my tendency to talk back, swear, wear wierd clothes, and especially the tattoos and hair. Not that they've ever seen any of that stuff or behaviour, since it's been so long. I'm extremely aware that I couldn't have grown up to be the person I am if my famil had stayed in Egypt, and I'm generally grateful that I got to grow up here. But I don't wat to lose that history, and I don't knoow how to tell or show Logan that part of himself. It still seems like something I don't have to worry about yet, but I do think about it. He calls his dad "baba", which is Arabic for father, and eats the handful of Egyptian dishes I know how to prepare, but that doesn't seem like enough.
It drives me nuts that there's so much info available about ANCIENT Egypt, but hardly anything at all about modern; it's like the culture is constantly being obscured by the shadow of what it was thousands of years ago. I mean, its great that there's interest, and the ancients were and did amazing things, and the interest brings much needed tourism income into the country, but there's so. much. more. to the culture, the people, than mummies and pyramids.
i empathized with this post SO much. wow. growing up indian in the south was a very disconcerting experience... we don't have kids yet but when we do i wonder what kind of cultural knowledge i will be able to give them.
xo
Posted by: amisha | August 08, 2007 at 03:30 PM